what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
Roommate is eating a chimichanga, watching Dr Doolittle 2 and weeping. His Tuesday hangovers make me feel better about my life.
I thought it went well, but he just sent me a video of me sucking an icicle on the fire escape of his building with the caption "The ice got more than I did." Somehow I feel like I owe him a blowjob.
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
Dude... You called me at 3am to tell me you still had your pants.
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
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