capris are just wrong
its like "what can i possible wear to make myself look short and fat? Oh I know!!"
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
I just farted a soft, gentle fart and it made me think of the eye puff glaucoma test at the eye dr. I hope that's not fart air they use for those. And yes, I'm texting you from the toilet and yes again, I'm high.
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
Randomize