I'm gonna cuddle the shit out of you tomorrow
Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
If my neighbors have super loud sex again tonight, I'm going to leave a ball-gag and roll of duct tape in their mail slot.
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
Randomize