ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
he's measuring my pool to see how much jello powder he needs. He got paid today.
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
Wait, you seriously DON'T keep vodka in your backpack??!??!?
If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
Don't tell him that you hope he dies in a boring missionary position with his wife. That doesn't go over well.
What shade of lipstick clearly states, I'm only attending this wedding for the drugs and groomsmen?
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
He actually said the words 'I miss you' followed by 'I wanna have sex with your face'. I'd say that's a win.
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