did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
I woke up surrounded by goldfish. Thank God my laptop was here too. Now I don't have to leave my bed all day.
You know my ex in high school who cheated on me and dumped me right before prom? A decade later, I just saw her again...working at an Arby's. it was a good day...
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
So I found out me and this guy I was drinking beer with tonight both got lactated on by the same stripper. We're milk brothers.
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
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