Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
Walking back from greek row alone at 3:30am in a child's kangaroo suit...not my proudest moment
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
I was just thinking about all the dick I could catch while I am home. But then I realized I am too lazy to get out of my pjs and leave my cat.
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
Randomize
