Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
I'm working on a search warrant...can u pick up box of Chardonnay...I'll give u cash when u get here...
Yea... I love that ur a prosecutor and drink box wine
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
Randomize
