were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
Out of ice. Vodka+club soda+cut up lime popscicle=I'm an alcoholic genius.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
I AM SENDING THIS TEXT MESSAGE SO I DON'T LOOK AT HIM. THANK YOU FOR RECEIVING IT.
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
The guy I made out with the other night fed me chipotle favored funions and I thought it was true love when I was drunk.
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
Randomize
