you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
I just woke up to a ten minute voicemail of you sobbing about the X-Men. Stop getting drunk and watching Marvel movies.
BUT WOLVERINE IS SO TORMENTED AND JUST WANTS TO BE LOVED
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
Randomize
