Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
On my way home i need to take a massive dump and couldn't wait.
So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
I'm way too hungover for life right now
i believe in u and ur pee
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
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