if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
anyone who texts me today gets a complimentary picture of my mangled foot. starting with you.
ewwwww wtf when you left last night you were fine?
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
Randomize
