I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
FYI... At my funeral, it will be your job to throw yourself dramatically onto my casket.
Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
That moment when the line ‘If you want a hot body you better work bitch’ in Britney Spears’ new song comes on as you’re using two forks to shovel enchilada into your mouth.
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
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