As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
Woke up in 100% not my clothes this morning. Third time this month. Fuck. Tequila.
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
I made out with a guy who was dressed as Borat
And like a minute in, I was like oh fuck what am I doing
Did you run away?
I DANCED AWAY.
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
Randomize
