is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
Too bad my thesis topic isn't "defining a hot mess: a study in drinking, smoking and other bad life decisions."
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
You HAVE to stop telling me about the shit you do drunk. I can't be both your brother AND your gay friend.
Like will they card me for my own whiskey in shampoo bottles?
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
He told his wife he was too old to pretend to be straight. She tried to argue. He walked two tables over and was like this is my highschool sweetheart and he's an excellent fuck, we're running away together. It was epic.
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
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