seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
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