And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
Friends bring friends secret work margaritas. my pink water bottle is in the cupboard
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
also Jesus you really need to change your diet. I just washed your baby gravy out of my hair and it's so acidic my hair is damaged. You have killer sperm
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
He kept trying to make out with me but I was just trying to show him Shrek memes
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
After drinking all day I popped an adderal, slammed three beers in a row, apparently told the bartender "thanks bitch" then ran on stage.
At Target. Everyone is stocking up on food and flashlights for this storm. I stocked up on beer. Dont judge me, it was on sale...
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