if my spotter knew I was listening to the Wicked soundtrack on my iPod, I wouldn't even be mad if he dropped the barbell on my throat
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
In other news, I'm pretty sure my mom was encouraging me to have a threesome yesterday... I don't even want to start digging in that garden of horror and trauma.
3 2 1 whiskey
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
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