I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
Everything about him screamed your future.
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
You tried to sled down the middle of the street. In. Your. Coat. Of course you are bruised.
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
He literally ejaculated and I hit Uber
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
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