I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
I woke up next to her will a oven mit taped to my cock. Dear god, I might have tried to use it as a condom.
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
It's blow job season.
"I gave a guy a handjob last night, on a dog bed, inside a fireplace. It's going to be a good year."
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
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