I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
Tonight was like the Noah's Ark of alcohol. I had to have two of everything.
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
Randomize