that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20
You fell asleep leaning on my shoulder at the bar
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
Found a Safeway Deli Sandwich in the shower this morning... Perhaps the 9th beer was unnecessary.
Just got that "I know what's going on with your vagina" look from that CVS cashier.
You bought MORE?!
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
I'm just gonna clean the house so my Mom won't think I'm hung over. I'll just start with the toilet
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
This is a friendly reminder to try not to shit on the toilet seat. If our 4 year old can manage it, I think you can too.
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