she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
i dont even know how to be here
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
You know what I'm hearing? Blah, blah, blah, I have pneumonia, blah, blah, blah, I'm a quitter. COME OVER AND PUT YOUR PENIS INSIDE ME.
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
When she asked why I felt bad I said that it may have had something to do with the gin and cold pizza I had for breakfast.... And then I reflected on what my life has become.
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
I just opened a beer with a child's toy at a 5 year olds birthday....can you look up the next AA meeting?!!
do nipples grow back?
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
Randomize