I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
I wish i had a shirt that said, "I know what you're thinking and it's not herpes on my face"
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fine line between drunken accidental sleepover with your best friend's lab partner and gay sexathon. I did a cartwheel over that line. A CARTWHEEL THAT LANDED IN HIS LAP
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
I have two bottles of emergency tequila stashed under my desk at work.
I’m getting back at my ex and training my new boy toy how to properly satisfy a woman. I’m killing two birds with one dick.
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
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