All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
if you find a joe biden blowup doll in the attic, I call dibs
apparently i broke a 100 dollar bill to tip the bartender on a free drink
gotta love it when a reminder comes up on your phone and u think u forgot about a meeting or something then u read it and its only to remind me to go to the titty bar at 3
we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
Of course he wants me there for his birthday. If a girl offers you a blowjob for every year of your life, you're gonna want her to be there.
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
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