just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
decision: in honor of being in new orleans this weekend all my drunk texts will be en francais
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
I crawled out his bedroom window, forgetting he lives in a split level and there is a 10 foot drop back there. I had to text him to come help me I twisted my ankle.
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
MY INSIDES ARE BASICALLY BEING WRUNG BY A CHAINSAW IM NEVER TAKING PLAN B AGAIN
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
I don't even care if you were high. The fact that I've been begging for us to have those cinnamon rolls for months and you didn't even save me one is not ok.
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
Randomize