Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
i think i have herpe
just one?
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
There comes a point where there's just condoms and old mcdonalds in your garbage can and you can't tell if you've won or lost.
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
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