He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
Today let's steal peoples pets out of their backyards and leave ransom notes
the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
well..after leaving the bar you handed me your wallet and said you didnt need it cause you were going to find the cash cab and added 'i'll see you on tv'
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
He tried to say "god bless your heart" to the stripper but it came out "god bless your pussy"
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, I need a lifestyle change. I'm to old to be making out with chicks in foam parties, letting older chicks get all excited because I let them put their hands up my shirt, and running around doing scavenger hunts with 18 yr old chicks.
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
Randomize