what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
I just gave some chick my debit card to put in the jukebox. She better put out.
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
I have 13 missed calls from when I slept outside on some rocks
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
We told him to puke in the Denny's parking lot or we wouldn't be his friend anymore. So he did. He wasn't even drunk.
Randomize
