woke up with peach flovored chap stick on my taint ! dont ask why i know it was peach
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
I think im gonna have to stop sexting on the metra. The middle aged businessman behind me just leaned over and whispered 'dirty girl' and highfived his seatmate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
Also, my aunt grabbed my phone and downloaded the scriptures. Apparently I need Jesus.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Welcome to the single world where it seems vibrator batteries are in short supply and making a sandwich while naked at 2am is relatively normal
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
Baked out of my mind. Went in the bathroom, a daddy long leg spider and a carpenter ant are battling it out on the floor. I brought my computer with some dubstep.
OMG THE ANT WON
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
Is it weird I can only picture you in my heels naked?
Be proud; I'm a versatile boyfriend
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