you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
I went out in a blaze of glory. I failed the field sobriety test by saying ABCD FUCK YOU.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
She came home, put on the news, left a 20 minute drunk message on her friends machine, then proceeded to play back the entire message laughing hysterically and then just passed out
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
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