i thought to myself 'what a productive day'. then i realized all ive done is one load of laundry and shaved my balls.
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
Oh wait looks like my cousin is getting deported THERE'S HOPE FOR THIS CHRISTMAS YET
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
My phone autocorrected "shhhhh" to "AHHHHHHHHH" and I feel like that says a lot about my life
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
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