i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
Your drunken mistake is coming over to see if she wants to buy any of our furniture. I know youre desperate, but try not to fuck her, without a condom, for a fourth time, while shes there.
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
I feel like David Hasselhoff when he's drunk eating that cheeseburger and crying. But with cheesecake.
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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