This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
I woke up with a black eye and dim memories of announcing that i had super powers. I shoved my pockets full of canned tuna and tried to jump off the balcony. And then my boyfriend called the cops.
so you're not coming in to work today?
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
I woke up with his wallet, but not him. Gold-digging at it's finest.
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
There's a homeless man outside the bar. I have a toothbrush and toothpaste in my car. I think i'm going to give them to him. And they said drinking is bad.
You're so thoughtful.
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
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