she has no idea who harrison ford is.
see that's why i'd never date someone born in the 90s
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS.
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
Look I'm really hungover so let's try this again. In 5 mins you're gonna call me and tell me that you're on your way with xannies, iced coffee and a back rub
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
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