By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
she danced around my room naked waving around the gold trojan magnum condoms singing "i have the golden ticket."
little did she know i was taping her the whole time.
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
Mom called last night while I was at the bar and asked where I was. I told her I was on the highway to the danger zone while the guys were humming the top gun theme.
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
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