Hey man sorry I got all grabby
I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
Dude I think you forgot how to talk last night. We kept asking if you wanted a condom and you just smiled and made weird noises...
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
I'm laying in bed cuddling with my teddy bear and eating waffles. I need a fucking boyfriend
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
I'm too drunk to make ramen. What the fuck is this.
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
Randomize