Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
my being single is dangerous.
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
As payment for all the times you have babysat me while im drunk, im giving you the shorts i stole from the guy i stayed with on friday night. They're clean. Come get em.
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
You knocked on your freshman year room door, told the kids who opened it "I own you", and attempted to force-feed them everclear.
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
I have "if found please return to" written in sharpie on my arm, my uterus is rejecting everything, and I have hickies. I must actually be an 18 year old piece of shit girl instead of a responsible 23 year old
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
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