kristin has been a bad kristin
Just did shots with my boss to warm up for our sales call to Childrens Hospital. I love startups.
Life lesson: using the oven as a heater= $500 electric bill
going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
I'm 2 beers deep on an empty stomach, and I just wanna say, I pride myself on my use of commas
The police report said i was screaming at someone that wasnt there, then the cops told me to call someone sober and i called mike to tell him "They are trying to arrest me for stealing information from the FBI" at that point they took me to jail.
Sorry, Geoff can’t come to his phone right now. He’s outside trying to show his dick to a bachelorette party bus with “DTF” written on the windows
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