Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
you made me have a moment of silence for the half of a sub sandwich that you dropped on the floor earlier
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
I don't care how much you're grieving a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.
Yeah. I don't know. I'm just gonna show up at her place on valentines day with a jock strap, box of chocolates, and rose clenched between my ass cheeks with "be mine" written across my glorious man titties.
I'm drunk from drinking bourbon out of a "cupcake sippy cup" at the Denny's bar. What the fuck happened to the goals I had?
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
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