Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
I saw your relationship status and wanted to write "Now you can fuck with some peace of mind that she isn't giving that other guy she met online a handjob."
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
So last night, I bought mother's day cards and the Plan B pill.
Tell me why i have 60 matches in 72 hours on tinder. Can i sell my tinder account like people used to sell their myspace pages and tumblrs when they had a lot of followers? Is that a thing?
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
I just drunkenly emailed my feminist dissertation as a resignation letter for my call center job. What am I doing with my life!?
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
Randomize
