And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
The Russian stripper asked if I like foreign girls. I told her I absolutely fucking hate accents. Most awkward 7 minutes ever
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
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