I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
Just got caught pissing on a plant in her room while she was in the shower first word out of my mouth were my bad
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
We need to rekindle our bromance
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawn mower thinking of you
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
Why is there a mildly painful bruise on my back?
You slipped off the sink last night.
Why was I on the sink......?
;)
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
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