this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
Freshman orientation day on campus. Dear diary, JACKPOT.
I love having hate sex.
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
Dude. Steinbecking. It's when you double-fist coffee and alcohol to help you meet a writing deadline.
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
Randomize
