Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
The cop didn't care that I was peeing on the wall of my dorm building... All he said was, "come on, it's 9am."
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
I just slapped myself in the face with my dildo and I know that's a weird thing to share but I just had to tell to someone omg I'm laughing so hard
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
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