do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
Woke up in a fanny pack with a bag of cocaine on my cheek
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
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