so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
Nothing says I've got my life together like buying a jumbo bottle of 7$ wine in sweat pants on a monday night
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
After a certain blood-alcohol level, the dog is in charge.
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
I'm gonna fight the coyote
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Randomize
