carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
No he exists. Who else tells me no matter how drunk I am to pull out. He's watching over me so my bastard doesn't get created.
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
If throwing a bottle across the bar, hitting a skank in the head and not getting caught was an Olympic event, you'd bring merica the gold every time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
So... I sharted on the plane. It was hard to maintain my composure and acted offended at the same time. I hate you for not cutting me off last night.
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