why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
i was getting a blow-job tonight in the mens bathroom of a bar and the bouncer comes in and says "bro i don't mean to cock block but you cant do that here."
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..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
I'm off the liquor
You're forefathers are ashamed of you. They didn't struggle to make it to America so that you could become a soft dick
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
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Does buying my brother condoms for Christmas say "keep having sex with her, I like her" or "dear god, do not get this girl pregnant"?
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
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