He is either going to be in my pants or get a restraining order against me.
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
Gave him an awesome blow job on his living room couch last night, so at least he'll have something nice to think about next time he's watching the Tigers lose.
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car?
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
You were so drunk you coat checked your shoe... Not even both of them. Just one shoe.
Dude just walked up to me, gave me his number and said, if this number ever calls its my penis,better keep that one handy. I cant lie its the best pick up line ever, im calling his penis.
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
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