fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
We're sending your burrito through the mail slot.
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so... the fat chick just walked over, shook my hand, then introduced herself as "versatile". shoot me now.
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
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