I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
I am midnight drunk by noon
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
The cop let me finish my J before he cuffed me. Coolest arresting officer ever.
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
Instead of texting me to come over, she just sends me a batman symbol.
I don't care if she's a booty call. Marry her.
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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