what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
Not only did she fulfill a life long dream of mine of banging in a library, she bought me subway for lunch. I feel like I got the best gold star ever today.
He called me in the middle of the night to ask my shoe size. Apparently big feet would make me an unsatisfactory third for the threesome.
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
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